I have been attending a church all my life and I have always volunteered and served as well as attended. The problem I face is that now – having spent so many years going to church – I could be an expert in faking it.
I can pray without meaning it. I can pray with my mind elsewhere. I can say all the words people expect but not really be there in the moment. The same can be said for sung worship. I know when to raise my hands and look the part while inside I am thinking about lunch.
It gets even worse. Faking it is dangerous and it is easy. I have been given the advice before, ‘fake it till you make it’ but this is completely unhelpful when it comes to church.
Firstly, what is ‘making it’ in a church setting – is it being closer to God? or not having sinned that week? Secondly, God wants us to come as we are, struggles, pains, trials and all. He wants to meet us in the place we are in, not just when we have the Christian life together.
If the bible was just full of stories of people with their perfect Christian lives the book would be much, much smaller. Faking it destroys us because it stops us from looking our difficulties in the face and offering them to God.
In Corinthians it is written that God will come and ‘expose the motives of the heart’. I don’t want my heart to be faking it, I want to offer God my all, my good, my bad and my ugly. Matthew 11:28 says “Come to me, all who labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”